Hopefully you will give me some grace and let me play the newborn card. I have been sleep-deprived and spread thin, and the idea of blogging just felt like too much effort. When I've had a free moment in the last two months, I've headed straight to my bed to nap, watch Netflix, or just lay there enjoying the blessed silence.
But now that Jericho has been predictably sleeping 10-12 hours at night for a couple weeks, I feel like I actually have bandwidth to communicate with the world.
Going from one child to two has been both easier and harder than I anticipated.
Easier:
- because nothing compares to the way a first child turns your whole world upside down (especially when your first makes such a dramatic entrance)
- because I already have two years of motherhood under my belt, which has given me a lot of perspective for this season
Harder:
- because we had a winter baby, which means we were stuck at home for longer to avoid flu germs (which gave both Phoenix and me some serious cabin fever)
- because it changed my relationship with Phoenix, which was more emotional than I expected (I had to just decidedly grieve the loss of how we related as a family of 3 in order to really embrace being a family of 4)
A lot of people have asked me about how the bonding has been. Honestly, I don't really have a normal bond-with-your-baby experience to compare it to, since we didn't even get to hold Phoenix for the first 18 days of her life. Because Jericho was ours within minutes of his birth, bonding has really felt intuitive and natural. When I get frustrated with him, there's a little voice in my head that wonders "Is this because we aren't bonded?" But then I remember that he's an infant, and they are just frustrating sometimes.
We are lucky to have another easy baby. I think because my babies are so hard-won, God has been kind to make them easy-going. He is really laid back and doesn't need constant attention, but he LOVES to interact with us. He smiled really early, and hasn't stopped since. He has this big, open-mouthed, crooked smile that makes me weak in the knees. He is quite the flirt, so I'm already working on my mommma-bear-stare to keep swooning ladies away in the future.
He was sleeping long stretches at night from the beginning (4-5 hours in between feedings that first week), and takes reasonably good naps during the day, especially when we keep them predictable.
His one vice? Feeding. Even while we were still at the hospital, feeding was an issue because he would puke SO OFTEN. Like, changing-his-shirt-every-five-minutes kind of often. Fortunately, he's slowed down on the puking but hasn't sped up the eating. Every feeding is an hour-long event, because his reflux requires significant breaks. This makes on-the-go-feeding fairly difficult, so we spend most of our time at home these days. I love all that one-on-one time, but I must confess I CANNOT WAIT for him to grow out of his eating issues.
It looks like our finalization hearing will be in the next two weeks, so he will be officially ours in the near future! Pray for favor with the judge ... we are financially capable of caring for a second child, but I'm sure our financial situation will surely pale in comparison to many adoptive parents. And pray that our legal grant comes through by that time, so that we can afford to pay our lawyer!
And, while you are praying, please continue to pray for Jordan and DJ (the birth parents). We have been faithfully sending our monthly picture/letter updates, and each time gently remind them that we would love to have relationships with them someday. Jordan actually did send us an email, but hasn't engaged any further than that. Pray as their hearts heal, that they would simultaneously soften to more openness.
And here are some pictures of our handsome man (follow me on Instagram if you want to see daily pictures of my sweet children ... because they are the cutest things happening in my world):
